Great Sounds Great; Bad Sounds Bad: Shotgun Alley: ‘Can’t Stop This’

Great Sounds Great; Bad Sounds Bad is a column which sees a panel of writers for The Corner review a range of local singles and grade them out of 10. Check out the song below, read through their opinions and let us know in the comments section your own thoughts and what you’d like us to review next time around.

[YouTube / iTunes]

[Grade: 2.1]

Edmund Barker: ‘Can’t Stop This’ is high-octane glam-rock at its finest, which is EXACTLY why I do not rate it. Shotgun Alley seem to be following in the Darkness’ footsteps with far less style and extravagance and are a worse friend to the 80s; borrowing all its stuff without giving anything back. Bogans will love it, I do not. [4]

Matthew Plunkett: Evidently this lame duck rock group is not supposed to be a joke.  This just goes to show that just cos you learn how to play a few riffs doesn’t mean your group will be rocknroll. Just cos you address the audience and subject of ‘generation rock’ in your song doesn’t make your song rocknroll.  You just sound desperate and contrived. This tune sounds marginally like Motorhead to begin with but then turns into a quagmire of weedy fistpumped vocals and guitars charged up on too many DB Export Golds. I guess its all about Motley Crue, Guns and Roses etc but at least with those bands their seedy, ridiculous image seemed authentic – even if it was idealistically rotten. This is completely vapid and deviod of any of the semblance of the danger that the style requires.  Guys are bimbos and girls are meatheads – lets rock – lets lobotomise ourselves in a feeble, pointless way. Should do very well. [0]

Phyllis Gabor: Rick from Home & Away’s voice sounds ridiculous and kills the whole song. I kinda feel sorry for him, he’s really obviously straining to hit those notes and keep a rock edge to his voice at the same time, poor guy. Pity it just turns the song from full thrusting hard rock to piss-take parody as soon as he opens his mouth/is revealed to be the singer in the video. Honestly, if I didn’t already know that Shotgun Alley are a “legit” band I would think this was a joke song from a Saturday morning kids show (obz minus the violence) (see: “generation rock”, which sounds like a kids show). “Rick” seriously lacks everything this band/song needs; he’s got no attitude, no voice and he looks pathetic. Someone give this man a Cody’s, for fricks sake. Like did Shotgun Alley think getting the hot guy from Home & Away to be their singer would bring their band some extra credibility fame-wise? Cos of course they must know he sucks at everything else. And I bet he got his mohawk shaved specially for the video shoot and thinks he is the ultimate rock guy now. And the lyrics are just as empty and contrived as he is. Actually I think the band all live in a bubble where they have just enough people telling them they’re awesome that they think they’re awesome even though they know everyone else thinks they’re shit. Or maybe they ~are~ taking the piss. Yawn as. The only remotely enjoyable thing about this song is the gat solo, which is totally good for a guy who used to be in a band with the guys from Kids of 88. [2]

Eamonn Marra: Oh god, this is so forced. Shotgun Alley are obviously far more about the bad boy rock n’ roll Motley Cruesque image than they actually are about the music. Shotgun Alley look like a band imagined by a thirteen-year-old who has started listening to “rock.” I bet Shotgun Alley describe themselves as hard rock, even though they are really a pop band. They are glam rock as played by bogans. If you bother listening to their music (and you shouldn’t, it is exactly what their image would suggest) you would realise it is just as boring, unimagined and obvious as their image. The chorus starts with the lines “you can’t stop this rock and roll/it’s too late to save your soul” which must have been used by a thousand bands just as boring. There is no space in the world for music like this, it has been done a thousand times and should just stop right now. But at the end of the day Shotgun Alley are too busy putting on their makeup, trimming their facial hair and pulling poses to \m/ rock \m/. [0]

Stephen Clover: True story: when I was typing their name I mistyped it “Shitgun Alley” so I had to Google that immediately to see if I had just invented a new depraved sex act. Looks like I may have, so I’ma give two points for that but minus one for not noticing that a guy with a keytar bombed their video shoot. [1]

Luke Jacobs: This sounds like my goddamn nightmare. Over compressed Pro Tools heavy bro rock is literally my nightmare. I am sorry Shotgun Alley but please stop, I can forgive HLAH for this kind of thing and I got slammed on the panel for sticking up for them but you sirs are no HLAH.  This is Midnight Youth but for the pub scene. No doubt about the fact that three chord rock can be amazing but it still has to say something. If it has nothing to say, then it has to be sweatier, rougher and more chaotic than everyone else and this song does not touch any of those bases. Lyrically I can usually turn on a filter that allows me to listen to rubbish lyrics and still be entertained but in this case I can’t.  There isn’t even a hit of irony at work there, I listened to the song and imagined what these guys would look like. I had to laugh because again compared to other turgid bro rock these guys don’t look like they could threaten a class full of first formers. Finally what’s the key-tar player doing? “Can’t Stop This”? For the sake of music in 2012 let’s hope we can. [3]

Leiana Heather: Mark Furze aka ‘Ric’ from Home and Away has changed it up. Big time. Further reinvention is definitely required because all I can see is ‘Ric’ in a bandana. My suggestion would be more facial hair – maybe just more hair in general i.e: lose the mohawk. I’m more than impressed to hear that he can screech like a banshee and just quietly I’m keen to see if he can pull it off live. The track isn’t bad but I wouldn’t say its good either. I feel like if you have six band members including superstars such as Mark Furze, David Love and Scotty Rocker the music should be a bit better. FYI I had a huge crush on Scotty Rocker when I was 14. Its slightly disturbing to see that not much has changed for him musically in a decade. [4]

Matthew Hutching: A shameful example of jock-rock’s decline since the glory days of The D4, Datsuns and Deja Voodoo. The band generally has the right stuff - Marshall stack tone, octave solos etc, but the lead singer’s thin voice let’s it all down. And he looks a bit like Ronan Keating. These guys could learn a thing or two from The Black Dahlias. [3] for the sweet motorcycles.